NSFW Sunday Will Seduce The Actually Embarrassing Lesbian Sex Stories! | Autostraddle

Thanks for visiting Embarrassing Lesbian Sex Story-Fest 2012!

Just in case you’ve disregarded:

Have you noticed just how everytime anyone brings up something gross about lesbian gender, we usually backlink to
the fingernails article
? That is because the internet seriously does not have the lesbian/bisexual/queer-girl-person gender equivalent of Cosmopolitan’s gender Stories or Sassy’s

Mortifying Times.

You might have actually an uncomfortable gender tale you should tell the world wide web. For gifts! Your tale could be brief or long (50 to 4500 terms seems in regards to right) and may end up being cringe-worthy or humorous.

The champion will get the Pop Your leading equipment from
Great Oscillations
(a form of this equipment was previously
assessed by NSFW Sunday
), which includes:

+ Hitachi Secret Wand

+ Fuchsia Pop Top Deluxe Silicone accessory

+ 2 oz. bottle of Kindly Fluid Lube

+ And internet fame!

Vote to suit your favourite from now until monday
! The winner will likely be established in a few days. Nowadays: it’s time. Down the page, the absolute most uncomfortable, mortifying, embarrassing, or hilarious lesbian sex tales posted by you.

---

1. Lesbian Auto-Sex

My personal present girl and I had been on our long ago through the cinema one night, and since I found myselfn’t sleeping over we made a decision to pull-over into a field to create “use” of my vehicle. Extended tale short, we’d fantastic gender and decided to keep, I went to change the car around, and it ended up being totally caught when you look at the dirt. We experimented with every thing to have it on, including the woman wanting to force it creating her dropping dull on her behalf face during the dirt. In conclusion I’d to contact dad (who don’t discover gayness or said sweetheart) at 1:30 a.m., clarify we were stuck in a field, precisely why on earth we might even held it’s place in industry anyway, and have him to come tow us on.

+

2. Maybe not Intercourse on the Seashore

You understand how people say that “gender throughout the beach” is truly sensuous and interesting and have even a beverage named after it? Really that is BULLSHIT. Although whoever “they” are probably intended like, a warm bright beach with blankets and possibly a chaise, and not a cold, windy night on New york seashore which, if you’ren’t from Los Angeles region, is a lot like the anal area of shores … in a terrible method. Anyways, i am going upon this girl i am dating, although wind helps to keep blowing sand during my face/in her pussy, and I’m coughing and it’s really nearly humiliating. So as that had been bad. But exactly how would we get my self? We get back to the woman destination, in which I go to get very stoned that I virtually COULD NOT GET A HOLD OF HER VAGINA. Cannot find it. We passed down somewhere around the woman ankles. The worst component is actually, bc the lesbo community in LA is really so tiny, we see their continuously. As a vintage YM issue might say, OMG MORTIFYING.

+

3. Fucking therefore the authorities

The summertime before college, I’d my personal very first girlfriend, and once I realized the amazing things of homosexual sexytimes I found myself demonstrably preoccupied, concise to be prepared to do so virtually everywhere. Display A: one-night after a dinner out, we made a decision to park my vehicle behind a closed-for-the-summer primary college and go at it. A female’s gotta do what a female’s gotta carry out, amirite??

So things are going fantastic until we come across headlights behind united states and we recognize IT IS THE COPS. We obtain dressed as quick as humanly possible and after a few frantic seconds of, “YOU’RE ALLOWED TO BE THE BUTCH ONE,” “NO YOU’RE,” we decide to get equivalent responsibility and we both get free from the car. The policeman is a significant middle-aged guy and obviously amazed to see two females emerge through the car. He’s every, “What are you women performing back right here?” and that I never even imagine intercourse happened to him as the possibility, even though we had been flushed, disheveled, the vehicle had been passionate, etc. HETEROSEXISM AT the BEST! Therefore we’re like, “Oh, uh, hanging out, sorry.” The guy eyes us suspiciously and says, “Well, i have surely got to bring your info.” My personal woman is freaking out about the woman moms and dads obtaining wind of such a thing, but he assures you it’s just program procedure. So he hands united states a notepad possesses all of us write-down all of our labels (precisely why the guy don’t merely ask for our very own permits, We have no idea). The guy shines their flashlight therefore we can see the notepad immediately after which we see … my personal girlfriend’s hand is COVERED in bloodstream. I assume I’d obtained my duration while having sex together withn’t seen. Therefore IMMEDIATELY the policeman is like, “WAIT, YOU’RE BLEEDING. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?” And my personal gf sees and freaks on and makes up some insane story about having slashed by herself on pocket knife on her keychain. The cop claims on searching the automobile (for systems?) and, finding absolutely nothing, at long last eventually eventually lets us go. Yet not before my personal girlfriend features inadvertently received my duration blood around their notepad.

We vowed never to have sexual intercourse behind a college once again (although not never in a vehicle, cuz that’s just too-good), then chuckled for like six months straight. For many years later we would joke regarding the time we had gotten caught ‘”red-handed.”

+

4. Damp T-Shirt Contest

I reside in a college dorm, as really does my today ex-girlfriend. One night we were inside her place, having a smashing good time checking out the strap-on she’d only bought from Edens Fantasies. As circumstances were planning to truly “explode,” the flame alarm moved down. My personal gf had been hoping to get the strap on off, nevertheless the straps happened to be twisted, individuals were shouting in the hall method, the RA ended up being slamming regarding the home, I was naked and I couldn’t find my bra, I didn’t have footwear, she was still twisted inside the damn utilize… She ended up simply pulling the toy out from the utilize, organizing some sweatpants on on it, and we ran outside, neither people in boots, myself just putting on a t-shirt and a pair of her short pants… and it is pouring. My t-shirt is actually white. I don’t have a bra. Needless to say, it absolutely was an uncomfortable night.

+

5. The 69’ers

My personal girl and I happened to be wanting to 69 for the first time. We believed it could be sensuous to try new things during intercourse. I found myself on the bottom and she had been on the top. Okay, so imagine my personal face-on the woman pussy and well the rest is perfectly up to the creativity. Well I found myself sort of unpleasant since I did not have much head assistance. Therefore I chose to lift my personal head some to make sure that i possibly could place some pads under there or something like that. Well… as I was trying to go my mind slightly she must have observed something had been happening and a little forced down. Really, perhaps not these advisable because her entire vagina/bottom 1 / 2 moved right up into my personal face. Yea, we laughed for a complete few minutes next.

+

6. Oops!

As soon as in high-school I happened to be fingerbanging this really hot girl at the woman house and she squirted. She was surprised, and I also perhaps was actually too, but she started sobbing! And I had been youthful and really odd, and I however don’t know exactly why but I began laughing, frustrating. Where point she slapped myself (entirely deserved it), visited the restroom returned and gathered my clothing (walking papers). So as that ended up being suitable but, I am not saying even kidding as I declare that daily that the tale haunts myself i need to air-five Dan Savage since it therefore gets better: as I was making I see her mother and I also get straight away stressed but act adorable and simple because I was an overall total charmer: “Bye, thanks for having me personally,” and various other this type of bullshit. As I turn from their, she got me personally by the elbow and stated, “right actually screwing touch my personal daughter once again, dyke.” I wish I would stated, or even simply thought something smart and bitchy but I just said, “sorry sorry” did this shameful bowing movement then I cried in the drive residence.

I probably destroyed that household though so it’s cool.

+

7. Ice Cubes

One-time I found myself having hot time with my sweetheart whenever – feeling particularly activated and fresh – we interupted the intercourse saying, “I’m going to go get ice, i’m going to be right back.” When I was actually moving away from the bed my gf pointed to a wet area in which I have been, saying, “Hunt what you remaining!” and giggling. Laughing, I then pointed where she have been and said, “seem that which you kept!” Strike one. From the bed in which my personal gf was in fact was a tiny small streak of poop. She immediately burst into rips. I happened to be surprised. Our very own beautiful time had used a sudden change for your even worse. As my personal girl’s sobs increased more powerful I found it harder and harder to supress my personal fun until at long last it burst away from mouth. Strike two. As of this my personal gf – nonetheless weeping – stood up and started frantically stripping the sheets through the bed. She quickly paced round the place getting brand new sheets on, blubbering on how gross she believed as well as how embarrassed she ended up being. We helplessly saw and attempted to devote terms of help telling her i did not imagine it had been that gross. “it is not a big deal, you just did not clean really well!” Strike three. She collapsed toward flooring at the end of the bed, pulled the big comforter up around the woman entire body, sobbed, and ate a complete package of snacks for the following twenty minutes. At long last, she calmed down, nowadays we laugh regarding it. Nevertheless, it had been among the many funniest however most horrifying encounters of my personal sexual life.

join cougar-dates.co.uk’s loyalty program for exclusive rewards

+

8. Stuck Fisting

Therefore, my personal girl and I also were viewing some porn on Cyber Dyke one night and had gotten truly involved with it, so we turned it off commit play. I found myself fingerblasting their and each time i really could think she was actually near to climax, I backed-off to try and prolong things. This went on for around 30 minutes. I finally had enough and desired her to finish, and so I worked up to fisting her, that was something relatively new for both of us at the time. Whenever she at long last emerged, it was really powerful, it really hurt my personal hand. We slowly decided to go to just take my personal hand out and well, she did not would you like to let it go, lol. We had been caught. I became totally panicked, i did not think I happened to be ever-going to obtain my offer. Neither among you knew what to do, so she begrudgingly called her aunt and dished the problem to the lady. We heard uproarious laughter from the opposite end for the telephone for like five minutes, whilst my personal hand still is stuck. Eventually, her jackass sis chose to end up being wonderful and carry out slightly Googling about the subject to simply help all of us aside and I also eventually worked my personal fist complimentary. We never existed that down though, her sister still teases me regarding it practically constantly.

+

9. Rainbow Gathering

When my personal sweetheart (of 6+ decades) and I also got together, I found myself younger and unskilled. Very unskilled. We were residing in a home that might be viewed as some sort of indoor Rainbow collecting with seven other roommates, directly across from a number of frat homes,and very near to the campus of a sizable general public college. Nobody secured leading home because individuals were also stoned to consider in which their unique secrets were. My gf and I also had lately bought all of our basic strap-on. Whenever I use it regarding first time, after about an hour of strap adjusting and dildo position, my girl burst into anxious laughter. Witnessing a dildo suddenly sprout from my personal big-tits, big-ass, buzzcut self most likely appeared a little ridiculous. Ten minutes later she had gotten across silliness of it all to offer me a blowjob. Then doorway launched. A burly looking, demonstrably intoxicated frat guy wandered in, stared at you for an extra, following said, “Ohhhhhh. Sorry, I was thinking it was my personal pal’s space,” in a tone that communicated both a feeling of shock and exhilaration, like he’d simply won the lotto or something. Then he endured there, gazing. My personal gf, dealing with the surprise first, informed him to get the bang out. He turned and was presented with, maybe not towards door. My personal girlfriend, having turned-in to 6 legs of pure femme rage from this time, got up and chased him the fuck out of the house, nude. I became remaining when you look at the room, choosing whether to upset the delicate stability of straps that held the vibrator set up or even place my tiger striped robe (provided to me personally as a gift from my personal grandmother) during the whole experience and hope it did not drop open. I decided on the latter, and timidly made my way-out to participate into the intoxicated frat guy herding.

+

10. Shower World

My girl and I had just finished setting it up on discreetly in the shower on the dressing area when you look at the movie theater at my college. She sweetly kissed me personally on the check and came in for a hug. Naturally We right away bro-patted this lady regarding straight back with two taps immediately after which believed instantly “what the bang had been that?… I am hoping she doesn’t notice/say any such thing.” We presented in for an additional second to compensate when it comes to possibly-strange bro pat. Then Again as soon as we pulled aside, she viewed me personally, bursts into laughter and stated, “Did you only pat me from the back…?” I seemed down in full shame. “ended up being that expected to indicate

great job outdated bean

or something?” I happened to be super petrified because of the whole ordeal at the time however each and every time there is an especially great rousing rounded of sex some one becomes patted on the back.

Vote for your favourite tale
right here
! Winners are announced in the future.

Plenty of material took place in lesbian intercourse recently!

+
The Rumpus examined

The need of Particular Behaviours

, an assortment by Shannon Cain which provides several viewpoints on sex and identification:

“obvious intimate information gas quite a few of Cain’s greatest passages, as really does the woman refreshingly agnostic and all-embracing viewpoint on sexual desire and identification. In “this is the way It Starts,” the protagonist Jane begins the storyline with a “boy” and a “girl” she loves similarly: “The girl is actually attracted to the woman strap-on. The son is partial to cunnilingus. This might be fulfilling to Jane. Plus, Jane can tell this towards woman: ‘It will be good when your dick were larger.’ Jane would not get this statement for the guy, though it may be somewhat genuine.” Jane ultimately ends up with neither the guy nor the girl, however the tale never ever shows that she should or could arrive at an identity-limiting epiphany, and rather comes to an end with an alternate assortment of bittersweet irony that i will not unveil.”

+ people have already been thinking whether gender addiction is genuine or is manufactured by people who merely have countless sex.
Relating to
the

Vancouver Sun

, female intercourse dependency is actually increasing, although the examples the article uses tend to be flawed (porn, s&m, and achieving matters are typical mentioned as evidence that “this thing is actually morphing right in top of us”). But unusual statements aside, this article raises multiple fascinating points.
Based on

Jezebel:

“That uncontrollable sexual conduct is a painful affliction is obvious, exactly what’s not clear is exactly what, precisely, constitutes the essential difference between sex dependency and plain old uncontrollable conduct, or if gender addiction even is present, at least in the eyes of some mental health experts. One critic of intimate addiction alerts that conflating sexual obsession with gender dependency does “real” addicts a disservice. Put simply, there’s a huge difference between being an alcoholic and preference porno a touch too a great deal. As one example, he supplies examples of alternative activities which men and women take part compulsively— like exercise, stamp gathering, and songs fandom. Not one person’s “addicted” to Radiohead. At the very least, I really don’t think-so.”

+ Having a “weird” name can affect your web matchmaking alternatives.
In accordance with
a study of 47,000 people of a German online dating site, individuals will “significantly unattractive” first names received less profile hits as opposed to those with “rather attractive” brands:

Very first names tend to be connected to stereotypes. Once we come to be acquainted with men and women, their appearance performs a role, but very really does just what this individual is known as. Definitely often the first information we get. This perception has a strong impact on the way we process more information about any of it individual. If someone has a dubious title, we often automatically associate him with a dubious stereotype. And then we go to assess all more information considering this dubiousness.

+

If flirting is actually a satisfactory device for journalists has recently been the main topic of discussion inside the UK, as a parliamentary report accredited after the phone-hacking scandal
claims it’s not
:

“within the heading “ten techniques used by some during the mass media – beware,” it mentions: “Flirting. Often interlinked with alcohol. Built to allow you to fall your defences and state far more than you intended. Be careful.”

Disclaimer:


The pictures on NSFW Sundays are obtained from numerous tumblrs and do not are part of us. All are connected and paid with the better of the capabilities in hopes of bringing in extra traffic with the tumblrs and photographers who have endowed you with this specific imagery. The introduction of an image right here should not be translated as an assertion associated with design’s gender identification or intimate orientation. If there’s an image included here that is assigned to both you and you want it removed, please email our very own tech director at cee [at] autostraddle mark com and it will surely end up being removed rapidly, no concerns questioned.